There are lots of good reasons to not have sex. You can choose to be abstinent
forever, for a few years, or for a few weeks. You might choose abstinence because:
- You don’t want to risk getting pregnant (or getting someone pregnant). No birth control is 100% effective.
- It protects you from most STIs.
- You can’t get birth control and safer sex items.
- Your religion or beliefs don’t allow pre-marital sex.
- You aren’t ready for a sexual partner.
- You aren’t interested in sex right now (maybe there are more important things going on, you’re not sure about it, or are feeling “sick of sex”).
- You’re not interested in sex at all. Your feelings may change over time and if you’re not interested in sex, it doesn’t mean there’s anything wrong with you.
Things you can do instead of having sex
You don’t need to have sexual intercourse to be intimate or feel close to your partner. If you don’t feel you’re ready to have sex, there are many other things you can do instead; depending on your own comfort level, of course.
Here are some of the things you can do instead of having sex:
- Hold hands;
- Hug;
- Kiss;
- Touch;
- Massage;
- Phone sex, “sexting” or cyber sex; or
- Masturbate.
There are also things you can do that can bring you closer to your partner, without actually getting close. These might include:
- Talking in person, on the phone, or online;
- Watching movies;
- Going for coffee;
- Going for a walk;
- Exercising together;
- Playing pool;
- Going bowling; or
- Hanging out in a group of friends.